Cookie Cutter Page 27
The air finally rushes out of her and she nearly laughs but holds it back.
“See I don’t wanna go back to the way things were either,” I say.
“You don’t?”
I shake my head.
“But the house . . .”
I look around, happy with the work I did here.
“I know, I know. Leaving here means I’d actually miss this place.” I look down at her. “And the people around me.”
“Carter, I don’t---”
“Technically, I sold the house.” My grin creeps out.
“But w---”
“To myself.”
“You . . .” Her mouth falls open and then without warning, she flies forward, swinging her hands around my neck, damn near knocking me over, as per usual.
“I love you, Iris, Alden, or Benning,” I whisper to her. “Whoever you are.”
I’m not afraid she won’t say it back. I simply want her to know. She pulls her head back when it hits her, what I’ve just announced. Her eyes shine brighter than anything I’ve ever known. More than anything I ever want to know.
This is it.
This is where I’ve been heading my whole life.
“You’re okay with that, right?”
“So . . . you don’t think I’m high maintenance?”
I bark out a laugh. “No, Iris. I don’t think you’re high maintenance.”
“But I---”
“Control freak? Stressed? Slightly overprotective, yeah, maybe, but not high maintenance. You’re the opposite of high maintenance.”
“I’m not exactly the easiest person to get along with.”
“If I wanted easy, I’d have stayed in California,” I say.
“I’ve been known to be obsessive compulsive.”
“Yeah.” I chuckle. “I know.”
“And very opinionated, apparently.”
“Ya think?”
“And---”
I kiss her again before she can convince herself I don’t feel the things I’m feeling. I figure the rest will have to sink in on its own time. We haven’t known each other a very long time, Iris and me, but I can think of someone I knew for a lifetime who didn’t turn out to be the person I thought she was, and I figure I’m making out on the deal.
Iris is exactly who she says she is.
She’s hectic at times, slightly OCD, a mama bear when it comes to her loved ones and so many more things that make me want to be around her, always. She’s perfectly imperfect. Just like me.
“By the way,” she says in between tongue touching and lip syncing.
All I can do is hum in response because her voice, when it dips low and sultry like this, it does things to me – but they don’t do nearly the things that her next words do.
“I love you, too.”
Exit stage left. Iris
“I love you.”
“I love you too, Mom.”
“You packed everything right?”
“Yes.”
“You have your cell phone charger?”
“Yes.”
“Your toothbrush?”
Oh, the eye roll. Nice.
“And you know I’m just a phone call away, if anything happens all you have to do is---”
“Call. Yes, I know, mom, I have to go. He’s waiting.”
James honks the horn for the third time. He’s chosen to wait outside in the car as opposed to coming in to help with Ally’s bags. Probably because he knows Carter is here – and probably because he’s still learning how to cope with taking his daughter on vacation with him.
We’re still discussing Paris. And he’s alone on this trip, which tells me he and Meg are over.
I don’t know who broke it off with who and I don’t ask. I don’t want to know.
It’s not exactly a vacation, this trip. It’s his yearly rental car convention. It was James’s idea to take Ally and I have to give him credit for that. Once things settled down between us a little, he gave his relationship with his daughter a lot of thought; he wants to be a better father, even if it’s too late to be a better husband. So I give him props, but not my trust.
“Please be careful, and don’t---”
“Mom, I love you. You’ve taught me well, Obi-wan.”
I laugh. She’s been hanging around Carter too much lately. Not that that’s a bad thing.
“Be good,” I say one last time.
Then I walk to the front door and watch as Carter helps her put her things into the trunk of James’s latest car. A Cadillac Escalade. He honks one more time and waves. As they’re pulling off, Ally rolls her window down and yells out to me.
“Mom!”
I breathe in. I half way think she’s going to scream that she’s changed her mind and please save me! But she doesn’t.
“See ya later alligator.” She smiles.
I’m definitely going to cry.
“After a while, crocodile.” I manage to choke out the words somehow.
As the car drives away, I know she’ll only be staying with her father for a little while but I can’t help but feel like she’s taking another step into adulthood, and away from me. She can take care of herself though, and she’ll make good choices. She’s my girl, after all. She’s got the whole world in front of her.
James, however, I’m not so sure about.
Before long, Carter’s body is pressed against mine and his strong arms surround me.
It feels good.
Right.
Since he’s become a permanent part of Spangler, my life has improved significantly. I still play cards on Friday nights with the Beatrices but I don’t spend as much time on community events anymore. I don’t have the time. With the side business of baking cookies for events picking up, I allowed the board to delegate quite a few of my duties to Meg. This way I don’t have to spend time with her and she gets to feel important, which is all she wants anyway.
Carter’s arm squeezes me slightly and his mouth is next to my ear, now. “I’ve got ya, Iris.”
I look up into his eyes and I smile. “Yes, you do.”
I repeat the familiar words I said to him the first day we met. But this time, I slide an arm around his waist and make one small adjustment to his declaration.
“We’ve got each other.”